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      ["title"]=>
      string(50) "10 Signs to Notice Your Lady Had Too Much to Drink"
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A list of some funny and not so funny ways that should be a signal to you that your LADY has had too much alcohol to drink. Besides the obvious slurs and swaggering steps to the restroom, here are some ways to let you know your LADY has had too much to drink and maybe […]

The post 10 Signs to Notice Your Lady Had Too Much to Drink appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(1822) "

A list of some funny and not so funny ways that should be a signal to you that your LADY has had too much alcohol to drink.

Besides the obvious slurs and swaggering steps to the restroom, here are some ways to let you know your LADY has had too much to drink and maybe you should take him home before he crosses the line from silly to nitwit.

You can tell when you LADY has had too much to drink when she:

  1. Ignores you. Hangs out with the girls leaving you to fend for yourself.
  2. Becomes the center of attention. Dances up a storm at a wedding reception, participates in drinking games, etc.
  3. Starts sitting like a man.
  4. Starts to lose clothing – shoes, belt, sweater, etc.
  5. Disappears on you.
  6. Loses her purse.
  7. Starts crying for no apparent reason.
  8. Throws up.
  9. Falls, trips or knocks things over.
  10. Forgets your name or calls you, “John” but your name is “Mike.”

Caution: Be safe. Don’t either of you drive after drinking. Call a cab.

The post 10 Signs to Notice Your Lady Had Too Much to Drink appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["wfw"]=> array(1) { ["commentrss"]=> string(94) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/08/10-signs-to-notice-your-lady-had-too-much-to-drink/feed/" } ["slash"]=> array(1) { ["comments"]=> string(1) "0" } ["summary"]=> string(568) "

A list of some funny and not so funny ways that should be a signal to you that your LADY has had too much alcohol to drink. Besides the obvious slurs and swaggering steps to the restroom, here are some ways to let you know your LADY has had too much to drink and maybe […]

The post 10 Signs to Notice Your Lady Had Too Much to Drink appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(1822) "

A list of some funny and not so funny ways that should be a signal to you that your LADY has had too much alcohol to drink.

Besides the obvious slurs and swaggering steps to the restroom, here are some ways to let you know your LADY has had too much to drink and maybe you should take him home before he crosses the line from silly to nitwit.

You can tell when you LADY has had too much to drink when she:

  1. Ignores you. Hangs out with the girls leaving you to fend for yourself.
  2. Becomes the center of attention. Dances up a storm at a wedding reception, participates in drinking games, etc.
  3. Starts sitting like a man.
  4. Starts to lose clothing – shoes, belt, sweater, etc.
  5. Disappears on you.
  6. Loses her purse.
  7. Starts crying for no apparent reason.
  8. Throws up.
  9. Falls, trips or knocks things over.
  10. Forgets your name or calls you, “John” but your name is “Mike.”

Caution: Be safe. Don’t either of you drive after drinking. Call a cab.

The post 10 Signs to Notice Your Lady Had Too Much to Drink appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1536398997) } [1]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(26) "Writing Tips From The Pros" ["link"]=> string(65) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/writing-tips-from-the-pros/" ["comments"]=> string(73) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/writing-tips-from-the-pros/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 07 Sep 2018 15:00:38 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(59) "Dating Advicedatedatesdatingexpertonlinedatingrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=815" ["description"]=> string(595) "

The key to finding success on any dating site like and particularly on Loveawake is to make sure that your personal profile is unique, compelling and fun. Here are a few easy-to-follow guidelines for posting an intriguing personal profile. Need tips for your photo? Read our Guidelines. Do this before you post a profile so you can be sure […]

The post Writing Tips From The Pros appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(3063) "

The key to finding success on any dating site like and particularly on Loveawake is to make sure that your personal profile is unique, compelling and fun. Here are a few easy-to-follow guidelines for posting an intriguing personal profile. Need tips for your photo?

The post Writing Tips From The Pros appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["wfw"]=> array(1) { ["commentrss"]=> string(70) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/writing-tips-from-the-pros/feed/" } ["slash"]=> array(1) { ["comments"]=> string(1) "0" } ["summary"]=> string(595) "

The key to finding success on any dating site like and particularly on Loveawake is to make sure that your personal profile is unique, compelling and fun. Here are a few easy-to-follow guidelines for posting an intriguing personal profile. Need tips for your photo? Read our Guidelines. Do this before you post a profile so you can be sure […]

The post Writing Tips From The Pros appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(3063) "

The key to finding success on any dating site like and particularly on Loveawake is to make sure that your personal profile is unique, compelling and fun. Here are a few easy-to-follow guidelines for posting an intriguing personal profile. Need tips for your photo?

The post Writing Tips From The Pros appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1536332438) } [2]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(31) "15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid" ["link"]=> string(70) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/15-first-date-mistakes-to-avoid/" ["comments"]=> string(78) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/15-first-date-mistakes-to-avoid/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 07 Sep 2018 12:49:04 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(38) "Dating Advicedatinghumourrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=812" ["description"]=> string(583) "

There are plenty of lists on the Internet about ten first date faux pas, which included bad manners, being late, and answering phone calls (isn’t this the same as “bad manners”?). Now, how about some tips that may not be complete no-brainers, huh? After the jump, 15 more first date mistakes to avoid. Quoting Oprah […]

The post 15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(1798) "

There are plenty of lists on the Internet about ten first date faux pas, which included bad manners, being late, and answering phone calls (isn’t this the same as “bad manners”?). Now, how about some tips that may not be complete no-brainers, huh? After the jump, 15 more first date mistakes to avoid.

  1. Quoting Oprah more than once.
  2. Shortening words that really don’t need to be shortened, like “totes,” “blowie,” and “obvi.”
  3. Starting any sentence with the phrase, “Well, my therapist says … “
  4. Ever mentioning your “girl boner.” Trust — guys do not want to think of you with a boner, no matter how cute you think the phrase is.
  5. Keeping your Spanx on during a make-out session. Girl, if it gets that far, excuse yourself to the bathroom and discreetly remove said undergarment and stuff it in your purse.
  6. Seeing a movie about war criminals, Holocaust survivors, or rape.
  7. Eating Mexican food.
  8. Saying “Let’s do this again” if you don’t really mean it.
  9. Planning anything that lasts more than three hours. (If the first date naturally goes longer, great, but don’t plan for it to).
  10. Calling anyone you ever dated “crazy.”
  11. Giving more than three compliments.
  12. Answering more than two or three questions without asking one in return.
  13. Asking more than three questions in a row.
  14. Breaking in brand-new shoes.
  15. Divulging your insecurities.

The post 15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["wfw"]=> array(1) { ["commentrss"]=> string(75) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/07/15-first-date-mistakes-to-avoid/feed/" } ["slash"]=> array(1) { ["comments"]=> string(1) "0" } ["summary"]=> string(583) "

There are plenty of lists on the Internet about ten first date faux pas, which included bad manners, being late, and answering phone calls (isn’t this the same as “bad manners”?). Now, how about some tips that may not be complete no-brainers, huh? After the jump, 15 more first date mistakes to avoid. Quoting Oprah […]

The post 15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(1798) "

There are plenty of lists on the Internet about ten first date faux pas, which included bad manners, being late, and answering phone calls (isn’t this the same as “bad manners”?). Now, how about some tips that may not be complete no-brainers, huh? After the jump, 15 more first date mistakes to avoid.

  1. Quoting Oprah more than once.
  2. Shortening words that really don’t need to be shortened, like “totes,” “blowie,” and “obvi.”
  3. Starting any sentence with the phrase, “Well, my therapist says … “
  4. Ever mentioning your “girl boner.” Trust — guys do not want to think of you with a boner, no matter how cute you think the phrase is.
  5. Keeping your Spanx on during a make-out session. Girl, if it gets that far, excuse yourself to the bathroom and discreetly remove said undergarment and stuff it in your purse.
  6. Seeing a movie about war criminals, Holocaust survivors, or rape.
  7. Eating Mexican food.
  8. Saying “Let’s do this again” if you don’t really mean it.
  9. Planning anything that lasts more than three hours. (If the first date naturally goes longer, great, but don’t plan for it to).
  10. Calling anyone you ever dated “crazy.”
  11. Giving more than three compliments.
  12. Answering more than two or three questions without asking one in return.
  13. Asking more than three questions in a row.
  14. Breaking in brand-new shoes.
  15. Divulging your insecurities.

The post 15 First Date Mistakes To Avoid appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1536324544) } [3]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(27) "Three Questions I Get A Lot" ["link"]=> string(66) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/three-questions-i-get-a-lot/" ["comments"]=> string(74) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/three-questions-i-get-a-lot/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Thu, 06 Sep 2018 17:18:23 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(10) "Andrew Tch" } ["category"]=> string(47) "Dating AdviceQ&Aadvicedatingexpertrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=809" ["description"]=> string(534) "

While I’d love to answer every single question I get, sadly, there’s only so much time in the day. But I can at least take a moment to answer the most common questions, as silly as some of them may be, and help the poor souls looking for the answers. How Can I Tell If […]

The post Three Questions I Get A Lot appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(3342) "

While I’d love to answer every single question I get, sadly, there’s only so much time in the day. But I can at least take a moment to answer the most common questions, as silly as some of them may be, and help the poor souls looking for the answers.

  1. How Can I Tell If He’s Gay?

This is a common question: apparently, there are many women who think gay men lurk in all corners of the globe, in singles bars and workplaces, just waiting for women to ask them out so they can turn them down. Which is weird, since all the gays I know are very nice and open guys who generally tend to just bang dudes instead of chicks. But, hell, maybe I’m just lucky.

The short answer is, you can’t. I’ve known gay men who hunt deer and blow things up for fun, and straight men who smell like lilacs and love showtunes. You’ve got to put yourself out there and, if you’re interested, ask him out. If he’s not into you, whether because he just likes a different type of woman, or because he just likes dudes, if he’s any sort of decent person, he’ll let you down gently.

  1. Am I Too Fat To Date?

No, no you’re not. Yes, regardless of how big you are.

Look, a lot of the Internet is undeniably gross and dedicated to pornography that would make Larry Flynt nauseated, but if there’s one thing the Internet has proven, irrefutably, once and for all, is that no matter what you look like, there is somebody who finds you attractive and wants to get to know you better. Seriously. Everyone. Google it if you don’t believe me, although I’m not responsible for any hysterical blindness, mental blocks, or other problems that may occur. I warned you.

Sure, there are a lot of jerkwads and people who will try to make you feel bad out there, but that’s their problem. If you don’t worry about how you look, it’ll stop being a problem to meeting someone.

  1. Is It OK to Cheat With My Friend/Coworker/Random Stranger I Find Hot?

Somebody who hasn’t been around the block as much as I have might be a bit shocked by how often this one pops up; you’d think people understand that cheating is a bad, painful thing that you shouldn’t do to other people. Haven’t we had thousands of movies and TV shows and talk shows and novels and self-help books and so on and so forth delivering this message that everybody knows it?

Well, yes, but they haven’t done much. If TV could cure infidelity, Philo T. Farnsworth would be the patron saint of monogamy.

People cheat for a variety of reasons: boredom, unhappiness, rage, drunkenness, hormones, crippling emotional pain. A lot of people enabling cheaters, if they’re not totally in the dark, are doing it because of their own problems.

Sorry, can’t validate your decision for you: it was a bad one. Just don’t do it again, Okay?

The post Three Questions I Get A Lot appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["wfw"]=> array(1) { ["commentrss"]=> string(71) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/three-questions-i-get-a-lot/feed/" } ["slash"]=> array(1) { ["comments"]=> string(1) "0" } ["summary"]=> string(534) "

While I’d love to answer every single question I get, sadly, there’s only so much time in the day. But I can at least take a moment to answer the most common questions, as silly as some of them may be, and help the poor souls looking for the answers. How Can I Tell If […]

The post Three Questions I Get A Lot appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(3342) "

While I’d love to answer every single question I get, sadly, there’s only so much time in the day. But I can at least take a moment to answer the most common questions, as silly as some of them may be, and help the poor souls looking for the answers.

  1. How Can I Tell If He’s Gay?

This is a common question: apparently, there are many women who think gay men lurk in all corners of the globe, in singles bars and workplaces, just waiting for women to ask them out so they can turn them down. Which is weird, since all the gays I know are very nice and open guys who generally tend to just bang dudes instead of chicks. But, hell, maybe I’m just lucky.

The short answer is, you can’t. I’ve known gay men who hunt deer and blow things up for fun, and straight men who smell like lilacs and love showtunes. You’ve got to put yourself out there and, if you’re interested, ask him out. If he’s not into you, whether because he just likes a different type of woman, or because he just likes dudes, if he’s any sort of decent person, he’ll let you down gently.

  1. Am I Too Fat To Date?

No, no you’re not. Yes, regardless of how big you are.

Look, a lot of the Internet is undeniably gross and dedicated to pornography that would make Larry Flynt nauseated, but if there’s one thing the Internet has proven, irrefutably, once and for all, is that no matter what you look like, there is somebody who finds you attractive and wants to get to know you better. Seriously. Everyone. Google it if you don’t believe me, although I’m not responsible for any hysterical blindness, mental blocks, or other problems that may occur. I warned you.

Sure, there are a lot of jerkwads and people who will try to make you feel bad out there, but that’s their problem. If you don’t worry about how you look, it’ll stop being a problem to meeting someone.

  1. Is It OK to Cheat With My Friend/Coworker/Random Stranger I Find Hot?

Somebody who hasn’t been around the block as much as I have might be a bit shocked by how often this one pops up; you’d think people understand that cheating is a bad, painful thing that you shouldn’t do to other people. Haven’t we had thousands of movies and TV shows and talk shows and novels and self-help books and so on and so forth delivering this message that everybody knows it?

Well, yes, but they haven’t done much. If TV could cure infidelity, Philo T. Farnsworth would be the patron saint of monogamy.

People cheat for a variety of reasons: boredom, unhappiness, rage, drunkenness, hormones, crippling emotional pain. A lot of people enabling cheaters, if they’re not totally in the dark, are doing it because of their own problems.

Sorry, can’t validate your decision for you: it was a bad one. Just don’t do it again, Okay?

The post Three Questions I Get A Lot appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1536254303) } [4]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(65) "5 Mind-blowing Facts About Kissing That We Bet You Didn’t Know!" ["link"]=> string(100) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/5-mind-blowing-facts-about-kissing-that-i-bbet-you-didnt-know/" ["comments"]=> string(108) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/5-mind-blowing-facts-about-kissing-that-i-bbet-you-didnt-know/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Thu, 06 Sep 2018 09:55:46 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(13) "Dating Advice" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=802" ["description"]=> string(648) "

1. The average woman kisses 7.9 men before marriage. The average slutty woman may kiss as many as 300…. 2. The average person spends about 2 weeks of their lives kissing. The average Star Trek fan spends between 4 to 6 minutes. 3. Passionate kissing burns about 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey kiss contains 26 […]

The post 5 Mind-blowing Facts About Kissing That We Bet You Didn’t Know! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(2930) "

1. The average woman kisses 7.9 men before marriage.

The average slutty woman may kiss as many as 300….

2. The average person spends about 2 weeks of their lives kissing.

The average Star Trek fan spends between 4 to 6 minutes.

3. Passionate kissing burns about 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey kiss contains 26 calories meaning it takes 5 minutes of walking or 4 minutes of kissing to burn off the caloric intake from 1.  

That’s what you can tell women at the bar. Let them know that all you are providing for them is a great workout.

4. Studies suggest that men who kiss their wives daily have a larger income.

[Written by a woman.]

5. Parachuting or Shooting a gun causes the same chemical reactions in the brain as a passionate kiss.

Making kissing a safer but equally thrilling option for black people and other people that feel awkward about jumping from a piece of metal at 30000 ft in the air. 

6. The top 3 factors that lessen a woman’s desire to kiss are: 
1) Bad breath,
2) The smell of sweat
3) The shape of a man’s chin.

I feel like #3 just took it to another level.

7) Most kisses happen on Valentines Day and in about 65% of the cases, the woman will tilt her head left. This head orientation preference is thought to be determined during fetal development.

8) During a kiss about 10 million to 1 billion different types of bacteria are exchanged, 95 percent of them are not dangerous.

The other 5%  may include herpes, HIV and other contagions but statistically, you’ll be OK.

9) Kissing may have originated when mothers orally passed chewed solid food to their infants during weaning. Another theory suggests kissing evolved from prospective mates sniffing each others’ pheromones for biological compatibility. Either way scientists have no idea whether kissing is an instinctual or learned behavior.

Scientist are thrown off at the fact that many cultures in Africa and Asia don’t kiss..

10) Kissing at the conclusion of a wedding ceremony can be traced back to ancient Roman tradition where a kiss was used to sign a contract. Similarly, placing an “X” at the end of a correspondence letter symbolizes a kiss.

The post 5 Mind-blowing Facts About Kissing That We Bet You Didn’t Know! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" } ["wfw"]=> array(1) { ["commentrss"]=> string(105) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/09/06/5-mind-blowing-facts-about-kissing-that-i-bbet-you-didnt-know/feed/" } ["slash"]=> array(1) { ["comments"]=> string(1) "0" } ["summary"]=> string(648) "

1. The average woman kisses 7.9 men before marriage. The average slutty woman may kiss as many as 300…. 2. The average person spends about 2 weeks of their lives kissing. The average Star Trek fan spends between 4 to 6 minutes. 3. Passionate kissing burns about 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey kiss contains 26 […]

The post 5 Mind-blowing Facts About Kissing That We Bet You Didn’t Know! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(2930) "

1. The average woman kisses 7.9 men before marriage.

The average slutty woman may kiss as many as 300….

2. The average person spends about 2 weeks of their lives kissing.

The average Star Trek fan spends between 4 to 6 minutes.

3. Passionate kissing burns about 6.4 calories a minute. A Hershey kiss contains 26 calories meaning it takes 5 minutes of walking or 4 minutes of kissing to burn off the caloric intake from 1.  

That’s what you can tell women at the bar. Let them know that all you are providing for them is a great workout.

4. Studies suggest that men who kiss their wives daily have a larger income.

[Written by a woman.]

5. Parachuting or Shooting a gun causes the same chemical reactions in the brain as a passionate kiss.

Making kissing a safer but equally thrilling option for black people and other people that feel awkward about jumping from a piece of metal at 30000 ft in the air. 

6. The top 3 factors that lessen a woman’s desire to kiss are: 
1) Bad breath,
2) The smell of sweat
3) The shape of a man’s chin.

I feel like #3 just took it to another level.

7) Most kisses happen on Valentines Day and in about 65% of the cases, the woman will tilt her head left. This head orientation preference is thought to be determined during fetal development.

8) During a kiss about 10 million to 1 billion different types of bacteria are exchanged, 95 percent of them are not dangerous.

The other 5%  may include herpes, HIV and other contagions but statistically, you’ll be OK.

9) Kissing may have originated when mothers orally passed chewed solid food to their infants during weaning. Another theory suggests kissing evolved from prospective mates sniffing each others’ pheromones for biological compatibility. Either way scientists have no idea whether kissing is an instinctual or learned behavior.

Scientist are thrown off at the fact that many cultures in Africa and Asia don’t kiss..

10) Kissing at the conclusion of a wedding ceremony can be traced back to ancient Roman tradition where a kiss was used to sign a contract. Similarly, placing an “X” at the end of a correspondence letter symbolizes a kiss.

The post 5 Mind-blowing Facts About Kissing That We Bet You Didn’t Know! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1536227746) } [5]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(43) "Four Things Not To Do Before the First Date" ["link"]=> string(82) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/31/four-things-not-to-do-before-the-first-date/" ["comments"]=> string(90) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/31/four-things-not-to-do-before-the-first-date/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Fri, 31 Aug 2018 10:47:13 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(55) "First Datesadvicedatedatesfirst daterelationshipstop 10" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=797" ["description"]=> string(612) "

The first date is tricky. You want to leave a good impression, but you don’t want to be overbearing, or accidentally offend somebody, or otherwise blow it.  Here are four fairly common mistakes, and how to avoid them. Don’t Overdo the Research This one is kind of new, but also kind of inevitable.  Leaving aside […]

The post Four Things Not To Do Before the First Date appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(2782) "

The first date is tricky. You want to leave a good impression, but you don’t want to be overbearing, or accidentally offend somebody, or otherwise blow it.  Here are four fairly common mistakes, and how to avoid them.

Don’t Overdo the Research

This one is kind of new, but also kind of inevitable.  Leaving aside that “stranger danger” has been pounded into all of our heads, as if serial killers were common instead of very rare, Google and Facebook make it not just tempting, but easy, to look up absolutely everything about your date.

There are two problems with this: one, you may discover something they didn’t want to share with you on the first date…or two, you may accidentally reveal you know everything about them, which kind of sends the message “psycho stalker”.  So stop the research at “he or she is not a psycho”: part of the fun is discovery.

Don’t Overanalyze The Communication

It’s a stale joke from a ’90s comedy about a woman insisting a date’s choice of restaurant has some sort of meaning, but, honestly?  Guys do stuff like that too.  Even the most supremely confident person will read something ambiguous and wonder “Huh…what does that mean?”

Let it go: you’ll find out what they mean soon enough.

Don’t Agonize Over Your Outfit

Once again, something we type women as doing exclusively, but it’s something guys do too, in great numbers.  And no, it’s not just metrosexuals, either: even the most boorish of guys is smart enough to realize he’ll impress his date by bothering to wear a tie.

Don’t Freak Out

Above all, relax.

The key thing people forget about the first date is that it’s not something to stress over.  It’s two people getting a meal and seeing a movie, while getting a sense of each other.  Yes, some dates end with two people shrugging and saying to themselves that at least the food was OK.

However, the most you’ve lost is one night out of your life.  The idea is not to evaluate the other person on a checklist, but to see if you want to see them again.  Don’t force anything, don’t stress…just relax and enjoy yourself.  Even if the first date is the last date, it’ll be a lot easier.

 

The post Four Things Not To Do Before the First Date appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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The first date is tricky. You want to leave a good impression, but you don’t want to be overbearing, or accidentally offend somebody, or otherwise blow it.  Here are four fairly common mistakes, and how to avoid them. Don’t Overdo the Research This one is kind of new, but also kind of inevitable.  Leaving aside […]

The post Four Things Not To Do Before the First Date appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(2782) "

The first date is tricky. You want to leave a good impression, but you don’t want to be overbearing, or accidentally offend somebody, or otherwise blow it.  Here are four fairly common mistakes, and how to avoid them.

Don’t Overdo the Research

This one is kind of new, but also kind of inevitable.  Leaving aside that “stranger danger” has been pounded into all of our heads, as if serial killers were common instead of very rare, Google and Facebook make it not just tempting, but easy, to look up absolutely everything about your date.

There are two problems with this: one, you may discover something they didn’t want to share with you on the first date…or two, you may accidentally reveal you know everything about them, which kind of sends the message “psycho stalker”.  So stop the research at “he or she is not a psycho”: part of the fun is discovery.

Don’t Overanalyze The Communication

It’s a stale joke from a ’90s comedy about a woman insisting a date’s choice of restaurant has some sort of meaning, but, honestly?  Guys do stuff like that too.  Even the most supremely confident person will read something ambiguous and wonder “Huh…what does that mean?”

Let it go: you’ll find out what they mean soon enough.

Don’t Agonize Over Your Outfit

Once again, something we type women as doing exclusively, but it’s something guys do too, in great numbers.  And no, it’s not just metrosexuals, either: even the most boorish of guys is smart enough to realize he’ll impress his date by bothering to wear a tie.

Don’t Freak Out

Above all, relax.

The key thing people forget about the first date is that it’s not something to stress over.  It’s two people getting a meal and seeing a movie, while getting a sense of each other.  Yes, some dates end with two people shrugging and saying to themselves that at least the food was OK.

However, the most you’ve lost is one night out of your life.  The idea is not to evaluate the other person on a checklist, but to see if you want to see them again.  Don’t force anything, don’t stress…just relax and enjoy yourself.  Even if the first date is the last date, it’ll be a lot easier.

 

The post Four Things Not To Do Before the First Date appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1535712433) } [6]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(33) "Examples Of Great Dating Profiles" ["link"]=> string(72) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/30/examples-of-great-dating-profiles/" ["comments"]=> string(81) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/30/examples-of-great-dating-profiles/#comments" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Thu, 30 Aug 2018 15:04:09 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(44) "Dating Adviceadvicedatingexpertrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=794" ["description"]=> string(643) "

Don’t copy these example profiles because then everyone’s profile will say the same thing! Just use them as a reference. Wacky single seeks same for romance (Woman Seeking Man) Hello! I’m a 29-year-old, never-married, fun-loving woman who lives and works (very hard) in the San Francisco Bay Area. I’m 5’7″, 130 pounds with black hair, blue […]

The post Examples Of Great Dating Profiles appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(2716) "

Don’t copy these example profiles because then everyone’s profile will say the same thing! Just use them as a reference.

Wacky single seeks same for romance (Woman Seeking Man)

Hello! I’m a 29-year-old, never-married, fun-loving woman who lives and works (very hard) in the San Francisco Bay Area. I’m 5’7″, 130 pounds with black hair, blue eyes, and bright green-painted toenails. I’m a huge music fan and love the Dave Matthews Band, Cake, Tom Petty, Susan Tedeschi, and the Gypsy Kings. I love all types of movies; my all-time favorites include “Raging Bull” and “It’s a Wonderful Life.” I also enjoy curling up with a good book, and right now I’m in the middle of “The Corrections.” I want to learn to play the guitar, speak Spanish, and snowboard with grace. What I value most in life is my rather large family, the Earth, and my hobby — photography. One day, I hope to become the coolest, sexiest mom with a van full of kids you’ve ever seen. If you love mushroom ravioli, romantic nights by a fire, and spring camping trips, please reply! I’m seeking an honest man between ages 27 and 35 who is taller than me, wants kids, likes to go hiking, lives nearby, and can appreciate a woman who’s often been called “refreshing.” Men who enjoy karaoke bars and foreign films earn extra points.

I’ll hold you late at night (Man Seeking Woman)

Are you looking for a sensitive man who’ll really listen to you after a hard day’s work? Look no further! I’m good looking: 6’1″, blonde, brown eyes, dark skin, nice lips. I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I work hard in every facet of my life. I’m also divorced with no children. I guarantee I can change the oil in your car in 10 minutes flat. Just looking for a woman who appreciates Sunday picnics, baseball games, fine French dining, Broadway shows, casual BBQ dinners on my porch, and a little imperfection every now and then.

Photo by Alejandro Escamilla on Unsplash

The post Examples Of Great Dating Profiles appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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Don’t copy these example profiles because then everyone’s profile will say the same thing! Just use them as a reference. Wacky single seeks same for romance (Woman Seeking Man) Hello! I’m a 29-year-old, never-married, fun-loving woman who lives and works (very hard) in the San Francisco Bay Area. I’m 5’7″, 130 pounds with black hair, blue […]

The post Examples Of Great Dating Profiles appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(2716) "

Don’t copy these example profiles because then everyone’s profile will say the same thing! Just use them as a reference.

Wacky single seeks same for romance (Woman Seeking Man)

Hello! I’m a 29-year-old, never-married, fun-loving woman who lives and works (very hard) in the San Francisco Bay Area. I’m 5’7″, 130 pounds with black hair, blue eyes, and bright green-painted toenails. I’m a huge music fan and love the Dave Matthews Band, Cake, Tom Petty, Susan Tedeschi, and the Gypsy Kings. I love all types of movies; my all-time favorites include “Raging Bull” and “It’s a Wonderful Life.” I also enjoy curling up with a good book, and right now I’m in the middle of “The Corrections.” I want to learn to play the guitar, speak Spanish, and snowboard with grace. What I value most in life is my rather large family, the Earth, and my hobby — photography. One day, I hope to become the coolest, sexiest mom with a van full of kids you’ve ever seen. If you love mushroom ravioli, romantic nights by a fire, and spring camping trips, please reply! I’m seeking an honest man between ages 27 and 35 who is taller than me, wants kids, likes to go hiking, lives nearby, and can appreciate a woman who’s often been called “refreshing.” Men who enjoy karaoke bars and foreign films earn extra points.

I’ll hold you late at night (Man Seeking Woman)

Are you looking for a sensitive man who’ll really listen to you after a hard day’s work? Look no further! I’m good looking: 6’1″, blonde, brown eyes, dark skin, nice lips. I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I work hard in every facet of my life. I’m also divorced with no children. I guarantee I can change the oil in your car in 10 minutes flat. Just looking for a woman who appreciates Sunday picnics, baseball games, fine French dining, Broadway shows, casual BBQ dinners on my porch, and a little imperfection every now and then.

Photo by Alejandro Escamilla on Unsplash

The post Examples Of Great Dating Profiles appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1535641449) } [7]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(47) "Since You Love Me, That’s Your Job Now Fella!" ["link"]=> string(81) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/30/since-you-love-me-thats-your-job-now-fella/" ["comments"]=> string(89) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/30/since-you-love-me-thats-your-job-now-fella/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Thu, 30 Aug 2018 14:30:12 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(10) "Andrew Tch" } ["category"]=> string(85) "Friends And Familyboyfrienddatingexpertgirlfriendgirlsguyshumourlifetipsrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=791" ["description"]=> string(619) "

I was reading some story recently about this woman who said she uses her man as her personal footwarmer in bed. I can’t remember exactly how she did it, but I remember – though I hope I was daydreaming – seeing the words “feet in his thighs”. Um, no. There’s something that just seems oddly […]

The post Since You Love Me, That’s Your Job Now Fella! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(3936) "

I was reading some story recently about this woman who said she uses her man as her personal footwarmer in bed. I can’t remember exactly how she did it, but I remember – though I hope I was daydreaming – seeing the words “feet in his thighs”. Um, no. There’s something that just seems oddly wrong and annoying about a woman using a man’s thighs to warm up her feet.

That got my big wheels to keep on turning. Proud Mary keeps on turning. Rolling. Rolling.

And we’re rolling on.

I can’t tell you how many women I know who believe men’s roles in their life is more utilitarian than anything else. It’s not that you all don’t love us, it’s just that if we are only good for putting food on the table, well we can be fairly useless. And I’m not talking about normal things like killing vermin and fighting off intruders. I’m talking about things you all could easily do yourself but somehow, if a man WON’T do them, he’s useless.

Kind of like warming up your feet. Here are few others.

  1. Changing light bulbs

There’s a reason there are multiple “changing a light bulb” jokes. It’s simple. But I’ve learned that women view this as man’s work. Except, what if the bulbs blow when a dude ain’t home? It’s a freakin’ light bulb. Screw out. Screw in. It’s like sex only with more tangible and positive results. Always.

  1. Driving

Riddle me this, Batman…why for come don’t women ever seem to like to drive? Let me caveat this by saying that I know it’s not all women. But a significant portion of women either really love being chauffeured or are allergic to steering wheels and forward motion. This one has often puzzled me when I have chick friends…just friends…who always want me to drive their nice cars when we go places. It could be a CVS run and I still have to drive.

  1. Walking the dog

Your dog. Your job. You go out in subzero temperatures to let Lovemuffin get some relief.

  1. Getting the car serviced

Hey Batman, I’ve got another riddle. What’s the deal with women in relationships preferring for their chaps to take their cars to get serviced? Oh…right. You all don’t like to drive. Never mind. Silly of me to even ask.

  1. Talking to customer service reps

This could be a personal one because one of my sisters was notorious for snaking me into calling customer service and waiting for 45 minutes to wait while she did other stuff. It got to the point that if she handed me the phone, I’d run like the wind, Forrest.

That’s a fairly solid list methinks. Ladies, are men preferred to do certain things you could do yourself? Do your men make you do things that they feel are women’s work? <—I’ve never actually uttered those words or made my woman do anything I couldn’t do for myself. Thank you. And good night.

Photo by Fancycrave on Unsplash

The post Since You Love Me, That’s Your Job Now Fella! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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I was reading some story recently about this woman who said she uses her man as her personal footwarmer in bed. I can’t remember exactly how she did it, but I remember – though I hope I was daydreaming – seeing the words “feet in his thighs”. Um, no. There’s something that just seems oddly […]

The post Since You Love Me, That’s Your Job Now Fella! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(3936) "

I was reading some story recently about this woman who said she uses her man as her personal footwarmer in bed. I can’t remember exactly how she did it, but I remember – though I hope I was daydreaming – seeing the words “feet in his thighs”. Um, no. There’s something that just seems oddly wrong and annoying about a woman using a man’s thighs to warm up her feet.

That got my big wheels to keep on turning. Proud Mary keeps on turning. Rolling. Rolling.

And we’re rolling on.

I can’t tell you how many women I know who believe men’s roles in their life is more utilitarian than anything else. It’s not that you all don’t love us, it’s just that if we are only good for putting food on the table, well we can be fairly useless. And I’m not talking about normal things like killing vermin and fighting off intruders. I’m talking about things you all could easily do yourself but somehow, if a man WON’T do them, he’s useless.

Kind of like warming up your feet. Here are few others.

  1. Changing light bulbs

There’s a reason there are multiple “changing a light bulb” jokes. It’s simple. But I’ve learned that women view this as man’s work. Except, what if the bulbs blow when a dude ain’t home? It’s a freakin’ light bulb. Screw out. Screw in. It’s like sex only with more tangible and positive results. Always.

  1. Driving

Riddle me this, Batman…why for come don’t women ever seem to like to drive? Let me caveat this by saying that I know it’s not all women. But a significant portion of women either really love being chauffeured or are allergic to steering wheels and forward motion. This one has often puzzled me when I have chick friends…just friends…who always want me to drive their nice cars when we go places. It could be a CVS run and I still have to drive.

  1. Walking the dog

Your dog. Your job. You go out in subzero temperatures to let Lovemuffin get some relief.

  1. Getting the car serviced

Hey Batman, I’ve got another riddle. What’s the deal with women in relationships preferring for their chaps to take their cars to get serviced? Oh…right. You all don’t like to drive. Never mind. Silly of me to even ask.

  1. Talking to customer service reps

This could be a personal one because one of my sisters was notorious for snaking me into calling customer service and waiting for 45 minutes to wait while she did other stuff. It got to the point that if she handed me the phone, I’d run like the wind, Forrest.

That’s a fairly solid list methinks. Ladies, are men preferred to do certain things you could do yourself? Do your men make you do things that they feel are women’s work? <—I’ve never actually uttered those words or made my woman do anything I couldn’t do for myself. Thank you. And good night.

Photo by Fancycrave on Unsplash

The post Since You Love Me, That’s Your Job Now Fella! appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["date_timestamp"]=> int(1535639412) } [8]=> array(14) { ["title"]=> string(60) "Cheap Dates That Won’t Leave You Looking Like a Cheapskate" ["link"]=> string(96) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/28/cheap-dates-that-wont-leave-you-looking-like-a-cheapskate/" ["comments"]=> string(104) "https://blog.loveawake.com/2018/08/28/cheap-dates-that-wont-leave-you-looking-like-a-cheapskate/#respond" ["pubdate"]=> string(31) "Tue, 28 Aug 2018 14:50:04 +0000" ["dc"]=> array(1) { ["creator"]=> string(5) "admin" } ["category"]=> string(47) "Dating Adviceadvicedatedatesdatingrelationships" ["guid"]=> string(33) "https://blog.loveawake.com/?p=785" ["description"]=> string(601) "

A lady friend recently told us a story about a guy she dated last summer. They met for ice cream, went on camping trips, hung around on the beach and saw drive-in movies. It was all very romantic. That is until one day, when he mentioned casually that he had only spent $50 on her […]

The post Cheap Dates That Won’t Leave You Looking Like a Cheapskate appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(4207) "

A lady friend recently told us a story about a guy she dated last summer. They met for ice cream, went on camping trips, hung around on the beach and saw drive-in movies. It was all very romantic. That is until one day, when he mentioned casually that he had only spent $50 on her the entire time.

The relationship died soon after this admission, but there’s a good moral to the story: It’s possible to take a girl out with very little cash, and have a great time. Below are a few suggestions for dates that won’t put you out, but may get you in.

1. Picnic in the park. This is an oldie, but a goodie, because it can win you a lot of points. For a good picnic, all you need is a blanket and sandwiches or some fruit and cheese. Add a bottle of two-buck Chuck and meet her at sunset and you’re the most romantic guy in the world.

2. Beach day. Hit your local shoreline or hang out at a nearby lake. You’ll get plenty of quality time and there’s not a lot that will cost you aside from a few snacks and the gas it takes to get there. An added perk is that she’ll probably be wearing a bikini.

3. Movie marathon. Renting a movie and sitting at home may sound too ordinary, but if you grab two or three on the same theme it becomes your own private festival. Since you’re trying to impress, make it something she’ll like. For most ladies, “Teen movies from the 80s” should trump “The Best of Van Damme.”

4. Photography scavenger hunt. If you’ve got a digital camera, you can make a date out of taking pics. Pick a theme and objective. For instance, go to the park and take pictures of the 10 most obese pigeons you can find.

5. Make a movie. Along the same lines, if you’ve already got a digital video camera, why not write a little script and make a short with your lady as the star? Make it a noir or a spoof of a spy thriller. No matter what it is, if you show a little creativity, she might even allow you to make a sequel in a different, more intimate genre.

6. Home-cooked meal. You don’t have to be Emeril or spend mucho dinero on the best ingredients. Just find a recipe on the Internet and go to work. Light a couple of candles and pour a glass of wine and you’re all set. Since you made the effort, she’ll probably overlook the fact that the chicken’s dry and you burned the rolls.

7. Volunteer. Most girls like a guy who’s a concerned citizen. Show her that’s your thing by working together in a local soup kitchen, or doing some other kind of volunteer work. It costs nothing and you may get paid back in other ways … like with an improved sense of self-respect. What did you think we meant?

8. Art galleries. Most art museums have a day of the week when you can pay what you wish for admission. With a little research, you can find out when new shows are opening to score some free wine and snacks as part of the bargain.

9. Take a hike. The best dates bring couples closer through a shared experience. Active dates have the advantage of being relatively inexpensive. As long as you can get to some kind of natural setting, all you need is a couple of bottles of water and the desire to tramp around a bit. Just watch out for ticks.

10. High school and college theater. OK, they’re not going to win any Tony awards, but you’re not paying Broadway prices. At the same time, inexperienced amateur actors have the ability to create an unintentionally hilarious spectacle. A good laugh at the expense of others may be just what you need to spawn a lasting relationship.

The post Cheap Dates That Won’t Leave You Looking Like a Cheapskate appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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A lady friend recently told us a story about a guy she dated last summer. They met for ice cream, went on camping trips, hung around on the beach and saw drive-in movies. It was all very romantic. That is until one day, when he mentioned casually that he had only spent $50 on her […]

The post Cheap Dates That Won’t Leave You Looking Like a Cheapskate appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["atom_content"]=> string(4207) "

A lady friend recently told us a story about a guy she dated last summer. They met for ice cream, went on camping trips, hung around on the beach and saw drive-in movies. It was all very romantic. That is until one day, when he mentioned casually that he had only spent $50 on her the entire time.

The relationship died soon after this admission, but there’s a good moral to the story: It’s possible to take a girl out with very little cash, and have a great time. Below are a few suggestions for dates that won’t put you out, but may get you in.

1. Picnic in the park. This is an oldie, but a goodie, because it can win you a lot of points. For a good picnic, all you need is a blanket and sandwiches or some fruit and cheese. Add a bottle of two-buck Chuck and meet her at sunset and you’re the most romantic guy in the world.

2. Beach day. Hit your local shoreline or hang out at a nearby lake. You’ll get plenty of quality time and there’s not a lot that will cost you aside from a few snacks and the gas it takes to get there. An added perk is that she’ll probably be wearing a bikini.

3. Movie marathon. Renting a movie and sitting at home may sound too ordinary, but if you grab two or three on the same theme it becomes your own private festival. Since you’re trying to impress, make it something she’ll like. For most ladies, “Teen movies from the 80s” should trump “The Best of Van Damme.”

4. Photography scavenger hunt. If you’ve got a digital camera, you can make a date out of taking pics. Pick a theme and objective. For instance, go to the park and take pictures of the 10 most obese pigeons you can find.

5. Make a movie. Along the same lines, if you’ve already got a digital video camera, why not write a little script and make a short with your lady as the star? Make it a noir or a spoof of a spy thriller. No matter what it is, if you show a little creativity, she might even allow you to make a sequel in a different, more intimate genre.

6. Home-cooked meal. You don’t have to be Emeril or spend mucho dinero on the best ingredients. Just find a recipe on the Internet and go to work. Light a couple of candles and pour a glass of wine and you’re all set. Since you made the effort, she’ll probably overlook the fact that the chicken’s dry and you burned the rolls.

7. Volunteer. Most girls like a guy who’s a concerned citizen. Show her that’s your thing by working together in a local soup kitchen, or doing some other kind of volunteer work. It costs nothing and you may get paid back in other ways … like with an improved sense of self-respect. What did you think we meant?

8. Art galleries. Most art museums have a day of the week when you can pay what you wish for admission. With a little research, you can find out when new shows are opening to score some free wine and snacks as part of the bargain.

9. Take a hike. The best dates bring couples closer through a shared experience. Active dates have the advantage of being relatively inexpensive. As long as you can get to some kind of natural setting, all you need is a couple of bottles of water and the desire to tramp around a bit. Just watch out for ticks.

10. High school and college theater. OK, they’re not going to win any Tony awards, but you’re not paying Broadway prices. At the same time, inexperienced amateur actors have the ability to create an unintentionally hilarious spectacle. A good laugh at the expense of others may be just what you need to spawn a lasting relationship.

The post Cheap Dates That Won’t Leave You Looking Like a Cheapskate appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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Am I wasting my time? I’ve been a widow for four years. I began to date a widower (wife deceased nine months). I felt it was too soon for him. We dated for four months. He went on a two-month vacation — to run away from me. Now we are dating again. I care for […]

The post Dating at 50+ : Answers To Your Questions appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

" ["content"]=> array(1) { ["encoded"]=> string(6335) "

Am I wasting my time?

I’ve been a widow for four years. I began to date a widower (wife deceased nine months). I felt it was too soon for him. We dated for four months. He went on a two-month vacation — to run away from me. Now we are dating again. I care for him very much and he cares for me. He informed me that he is confused. He did not think he would meet someone and care for someone again. Do you think I’m wasting my time and emotions on this man? — Gloria B., 56, Mission Viejo, Calif.

Gloria, dating a widower is risky business. Be very careful with your heart. He simply isn’t ready. So many widows and widowers have to deal with this very issue. The first three chapters are devoted to how soon widows and widowers should date again. By telling you he’s “confused,” he’s really saying he’s not ready to get involved again and may never be. If you try too hard, you’ll drive him away. I’m not saying it won’t work, just be very careful. Proceed cautiously and remember to protect your heart.

Race or drop out?

I met a wonderful lady online last November. After a whirlwind four months of really getting to know each other and discovering the depth of our mutual attraction, emotionally and physically, she slowed down and eventually disclosed her desire that I be slim like her, not rounded like me. She has decided to date others. So have I, though we continue to see each other periodically. When a guy slips from first place in the race for the love of a gal and finds himself competing with her new finds, should he give up or take the suggested step and try to regain first place? — Jerry E., 60, Fullerton, Calif.

Jerry, try to regain first place. Here’s how: You need to focus on you. I would start an exercise program and work hard on getting into shape and losing some of that “roundness.” This may not help your situation with her, but it’s going to make you feel better, live longer and improve your chances of meeting someone in the future. The next time you see her, thank her for inspiring you to change your life. Don’t delay another day. This adversity of losing her will likely yield opportunity in the future.

Wait or date?

I am recently separated after 13 years of marriage. Even though we didn’t have an intimate relationship for the last few years, I remained faithful. Should I wait a certain length of time before dating? — Charlotte D., 56, Camp Springs, Md.

Charlotte, should you wait to date? Why? It seems you already waited. If you weren’t intimate for a few years, you didn’t have much of a marriage. Get on with your life.

New reality

I have been a widow for two years. I have dated some but have found it hard to figure out the dating scene after being with the same man for 35 years (since my 20s). Things have changed so much. Expectations are different and so are relationships. Most men I have met are divorced at least once and have a very different perspective on things than I do. Should I adapt to the new reality or are there other people who value relationships as I do? — Pam H., 57, Limington, Maine

Pam, yes, you need to adapt to the new reality. You need to become dating savvy.

What’s the attraction of abuse?

Why do women stick to an abusive man who uses them and treats them like dirt? These women keep going back for more abuse! I’m a nice guy who treats women with respect. I’m loyal and devoted to them. Then they turn and dump me for guys who abuse them. After awhile, they call and ask me to take them back! I say “no” because they had it good with me and I refuse to let them hurt me again! If you do it once, you’ll do it again! Am I being unreasonable? — Richard T., 64, Pasadena, Md.

Richard, you say “these women,” which means more than one. If you’re only dating women who have been or are being abused, you’re finding women in all the wrong places. You should select women to date who have experienced healthy relationships and want healthy relationships. For the most part, women want and appreciate nice guys who treat them with respect and are loyal and devoted. Perhaps you’re trying a little too hard and coming off as too nice and too dedicated. Women may feel that you cater to them too much and that you’re too wimpy. So, evaluate the way you treat women and how they treat you. What you give, you should get back in return. That’s called balance in a relationship. Be nice but not too nice.

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Am I wasting my time? I’ve been a widow for four years. I began to date a widower (wife deceased nine months). I felt it was too soon for him. We dated for four months. He went on a two-month vacation — to run away from me. Now we are dating again. I care for […]

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Am I wasting my time?

I’ve been a widow for four years. I began to date a widower (wife deceased nine months). I felt it was too soon for him. We dated for four months. He went on a two-month vacation — to run away from me. Now we are dating again. I care for him very much and he cares for me. He informed me that he is confused. He did not think he would meet someone and care for someone again. Do you think I’m wasting my time and emotions on this man? — Gloria B., 56, Mission Viejo, Calif.

Gloria, dating a widower is risky business. Be very careful with your heart. He simply isn’t ready. So many widows and widowers have to deal with this very issue. The first three chapters are devoted to how soon widows and widowers should date again. By telling you he’s “confused,” he’s really saying he’s not ready to get involved again and may never be. If you try too hard, you’ll drive him away. I’m not saying it won’t work, just be very careful. Proceed cautiously and remember to protect your heart.

Race or drop out?

I met a wonderful lady online last November. After a whirlwind four months of really getting to know each other and discovering the depth of our mutual attraction, emotionally and physically, she slowed down and eventually disclosed her desire that I be slim like her, not rounded like me. She has decided to date others. So have I, though we continue to see each other periodically. When a guy slips from first place in the race for the love of a gal and finds himself competing with her new finds, should he give up or take the suggested step and try to regain first place? — Jerry E., 60, Fullerton, Calif.

Jerry, try to regain first place. Here’s how: You need to focus on you. I would start an exercise program and work hard on getting into shape and losing some of that “roundness.” This may not help your situation with her, but it’s going to make you feel better, live longer and improve your chances of meeting someone in the future. The next time you see her, thank her for inspiring you to change your life. Don’t delay another day. This adversity of losing her will likely yield opportunity in the future.

Wait or date?

I am recently separated after 13 years of marriage. Even though we didn’t have an intimate relationship for the last few years, I remained faithful. Should I wait a certain length of time before dating? — Charlotte D., 56, Camp Springs, Md.

Charlotte, should you wait to date? Why? It seems you already waited. If you weren’t intimate for a few years, you didn’t have much of a marriage. Get on with your life.

New reality

I have been a widow for two years. I have dated some but have found it hard to figure out the dating scene after being with the same man for 35 years (since my 20s). Things have changed so much. Expectations are different and so are relationships. Most men I have met are divorced at least once and have a very different perspective on things than I do. Should I adapt to the new reality or are there other people who value relationships as I do? — Pam H., 57, Limington, Maine

Pam, yes, you need to adapt to the new reality. You need to become dating savvy.

What’s the attraction of abuse?

Why do women stick to an abusive man who uses them and treats them like dirt? These women keep going back for more abuse! I’m a nice guy who treats women with respect. I’m loyal and devoted to them. Then they turn and dump me for guys who abuse them. After awhile, they call and ask me to take them back! I say “no” because they had it good with me and I refuse to let them hurt me again! If you do it once, you’ll do it again! Am I being unreasonable? — Richard T., 64, Pasadena, Md.

Richard, you say “these women,” which means more than one. If you’re only dating women who have been or are being abused, you’re finding women in all the wrong places. You should select women to date who have experienced healthy relationships and want healthy relationships. For the most part, women want and appreciate nice guys who treat them with respect and are loyal and devoted. Perhaps you’re trying a little too hard and coming off as too nice and too dedicated. Women may feel that you cater to them too much and that you’re too wimpy. So, evaluate the way you treat women and how they treat you. What you give, you should get back in return. That’s called balance in a relationship. Be nice but not too nice.

The post Dating at 50+ : Answers To Your Questions appeared first on Loveawake.com blog.

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